Sexual Misconduct Against Minor

Hi Rabbi , i hope youre well. As my following question is not so easy to ask, let alone to type but i must , in the case of sexual misconduct towards a minor on multiple occasions worse case scenario , i heard without the childs forgivness god cant grant the offender full atonement . But is there a way god can grant full forgivness if the offender / abuser repents and ask specifically god for the child to heal and in time so the child themselve decide to forgive the offender in time / abuser in time while the abuser /offender still tries to pray , and therefore in time that the child would forgive the abuser / offender because god would make it so to be possible? But non physical abuse , but like internet sexual chat with a minor for instince ? And if the offender cannot get in touch with the victim themselve after the bad texting incedent if theres no way of contacting the child trying to ask for forgivness , is it somehow possible to recieve full atonement still someway ? And if godforbid not , then should the offender/ abuser lose all hope and not ever pray to god at all after those horrible instances/ instance? Is there a way out from this complex situation, or all hope is lost for such am individual ?

Shalom!

Thank you for your question.

There are a number of issues to your inquiry that must be resolved.

1. Most sexual offenders and the like require counselling and therapy to cure themselves from this unnatural and inappropriate behavior. This is a must

2. It is true that child cannot “halachically” forgive someone who hurst them. Forgiveness must be sought immediately and then again after the bar/bat mitzva.

3. Repentance and forgiveness must also be sought from G-d as such behavior is a violation of the Torah and sinful in its own right.

4. It must be emphasized that in most such cases (on advice of a competent orthodox Rabbi) it is permitted to inform the police and authorities about sexual offenders to keep the public safe.

5. If one is unable to contact the offender in any way, then one should pray to G-d for forgiveness and seek advice from a Rav on how to do true teshuvah.

Hope is never lost. But extensive efforts and change will be required by the offender.

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